Little Birds Leaving The Nest

Hello February! I have to confess -This morning I have been hunkered down among my multitude of fluffy pillows and toasty blankets, completely and utterly self indulgent and loving it! This is just what I needed after the breakneck pace of the weekend.  Time to relax and recharge.

I have witnessed so many life changing moments with my girls and each one carries just a hint of sadness when I stop to realize that we are on the threshold of a new chapter in their lives. New chapters usually mean an end to the old chapters.. you know, the ones where they are my little girls and they need me to take care of them. In the blink of an eye these little creatures are all grown up and thinking about taking complete command of their own lives. Now I have to consciously stifle my instinct to speak up about what I think they should do and let them make those decisions (for better or worse) on their own.  This is new territory for all of us and as exciting as it is, it's still a little scary too.  Have I taught them well enough? Do they have the skills they need to hop from the nest and soar?

Last weekend was dedicated to all things scholarship. Carley has been working hard to earn college money and I was doing everything I could to help. She had an interview on Saturday with the art department at WSU and she did so well! She spotlighted her Angel piece and the members on the panel told her they could look at it all day. (Me too!) Carley came home so excited about her future at WSU. She will be entering her Angel piece into their art show coming up soon and I'll be sure to let you know when we hear anything about the department scholarship.

After the art department scholarship, we dove right into the Ambassador scholarship, also at WSU. This is the scholarship I am crossing my fingers for. Being selected as an Ambassador would mean a full ride scholarship plus a small stipend each semester which would probably be enough for books too. All of Carley's high school preparation has been leading up to this scholarship and we worked very hard on her application for it. I think she's the perfect candidate but once again we can only wait and see.

This waiting game is going to give me even more gray hair!

Finally we finished up yesterday with the Delta scholarship. Carley said all along that this one would be the easiest to do and she was right! Because we had worked so hard on the Sterling Scholar application and the other two for WSU, all we had to do for the Delta scholarship was pull pieces from each one as needed. It now sits on the counter waiting for me to mail it off today and with that, scholarship season has officially come to an end.

Now we wait.

Madi has a full ride to WSU based on her ACT grades. We are so proud of her! She didn't want to apply for any other scholarships and I struggled to accept that. We had a few bumpy moments when I tried to push her into doing something she didn't want to do and then I had to just let go. I can't make decisions for them.. even if I think it was the best thing for her, she wasn't interested and forcing the issue only made us both miserable. This is the part where I have to learn new skills and let them make their own choices. I'm still extremely proud of Madi's accomplishments and I want nothing but the best for her when it comes to her college experiences. I know she'll do great!

My oldest girls are so grown up now! They are preparing for college life in which they will take those steps as (mostly) independent women. The choices they make from now on will guide the direction of their entire future. That's a big deal! I  know they are excited about college and the new doors opening all around them. I hope that their choices will always be the best ones for them. But man oh man is it going to be tough on me!

One spring a robin built its nest in the sheltered nook of our front porch. We watched this beautiful fella build his nest with carefully chosen twigs, grass and bits of shiny things. We invested our hopes in the brightly colored eggs that we discovered in that nest one day and we carefully roped off the porch when those adorable little birds emerged. Hours were spent watching that little family from our living room. We saw both parents taking care of the little birds that awkwardly stretched their necks each time food was offered. For weeks we delighted in the changes of the little birds and they grew stronger and cuter by the day. One day I watched as the round fluffy babies hopped up on the edge of the nest and vigorously beat their tiny wings against the slight breeze. I held my breath fearing this would be the day that they flew away for good. But after a nice workout, they hopped back into their cozy nest and carried on with their happy chirping when their parents showed up. One morning we checked the nest and it was empty. Those little birds had flown away without warning and we missed their presence. However, as the days went on there were sightings of those little birds hopping around our yard and we were so happy to see them doing so well. We were grateful that we had seen their beginnings and we hoped they would always be happy, healthy little birds.

My girlies are so much like those little robins.

I have taken care of these girlies for over 18 years. I have carefully watched over them and tried my best to make decisions that were always in their best interest. I tried to surround them with happiness and love and give them the skills they would need to always do the right thing. I admit, I'm not ready for this phase. My instinct is to keep guiding them and making decisions for them. Now I have to make myself take a backseat... it's time to see how well they will do on their own.  This is the part where I am supposed let go and oh my goodness it is so difficult to do!

They're going to be just fine. Better than fine.  They're going to be rockin' awesome!