A Mother's Kindness Is The Most Important

One of my oldest girls recently took a trip to Texas to work with her father on videoing a conference. Oh how I missed her while she was gone! I send her off on these excursions with great trepidation because we know there will be difficult challenges at best, and if worst comes to pass, she could be alone and facing danger.  I won't get into details of past conference experiences here, but suffice it to say that my heart sent out a constant plea of "please keep her safe" the entire time she was away.

I was relieved that Madi had a good time at the conference and that she was able to manage the slight hardships she experienced while she was away. When she returned home last night, we were all grins and giggles as we played catch up, exchanging stories of events that occurred while she was away. One of those exchanges still has me thinking today... so much so that I had to put it into words here.

Madi told me how she overheard one side of a phone conversation in which a mother was yelling at her young child for crying about cotton candy that was taken from her by her older brother. Madi's cheerful countenance became serious and her eyes grew sad as she told me how she felt it just wasn't right for the mother to behave that way. I thought about it for a minute before I agreed that it wasn't the best parenting skills that she witnessed, but I also explained to her that mothering is a difficult job, one of the most difficult in life, and it can become a hardship when a mother is left to raise children mostly on her own.

Today I find myself still thinking about that conversation and how it relates to the past experiences of my little family. I won't say that I was a single mother, because I was married most of the years that my children were young. However, I was physically and emotionally alone most of the time. When my young daughters were having difficult days, I was the one who had to calm them and discipline when necessary. Of course, the upside of this is that I was the one who claimed most of the hugs, kisses and snuggles too. I remember very clearly the day that I wrote P A T I E N C E in purple crayon across the front of my freezer door so that I would have a visual reminder as I tended to my active children throughout the day. I cannot remember the events of the day or exactly what I was feeling, but something inside of me knew that I needed a strong visual reminder when my last nerve began to fray.

To this day, I keep that visual memory of P A T I E N C E in my mind. I may not be a young mother any more, but I do know that children are the most precious of all gifts and that a mother is their first and best champion throughout their lives. A mother's job is to soothe and calm the child whenever it is needed. It isn't always easy, especially in today's world where days are hectic and nerves fray easily, but I know firsthand what happens when a child feels alone and helpless and I vowed that would never happen to my girls.

Kindness matters.

I want my girls to understand that laundry can wait, the household chores can be put off a little while longer, but never... ever put off hugging or loving a child who needs you. Time, just like children, is precious.. and once it is gone, no matter how desperately we wish we could go back and change it, we can never get those moments back.

Make every moment count, my sweet girls. One day you will be mothers with families of your own and your patience and kindness will be rewarded in your children's love and laughter.  Be the champion and safe haven for others, especially children.

Always.