Saturday, July 30, 2011

Never Enough Time - Enjoy Every Moment We're Given

I'd love to tell you that I've been away on some fantastic vacay, but the truth is plain-vanilla boring.  I've been here, concussed and foggy- but more or less here, doing the normal every day living.  I go to work, I come home and say hello to whatever girlies happen to be home at the time, and I complain about the dogs.  Normal... Boring!

(Except for the day at Pineview with my besties and the adventure of FIVE of the girls getting pulled over by the water police.. but that's a story for another day!)

During those rare, quiet moments.. I think about my life and how lucky I am to be where I am, surrounded by my favorite people on the planet.  It's getting harder and harder to catch time with my lovelies as they get older and their lives, which have been somewhat pliable up until this point (think Play-Dough pliable and you'll get my meaning), have suddenly taken on a more concrete form... a form in which I'm more of a supporting actress, or extra, instead of the lead.

Wow... did any of that make sense?  If not then let's go ahead and blame the concussion since that excuse is really working for me lately. 

My point is that my girls are growing up. Their lives are becoming their own and I find myself more and more on the fringes... trying to understand this new way of life and what it means for my family. It's hard to let go. I have nurtured and cared for these little creatures their whole lives.. I've known where they were almost every minute.. and now I find that sometimes entire days pass by without communication with one or more of my girls. Ouch and double ouch.

Just yesterday I was driving past the high school when I noticed a strikingly familiar red Jeep parked in the otherwise empty lot. I wondered out loud if that was my Emily's Jeep parked there and then I was amazed that I had no idea where my girls were at that point in time. Wow. Just.. wow.  Turns out it was Emily's Jeep and she was there goofing off with friends. But the point is that my little ones have grown up and are running their own lives more and more.

I need to find a way to make this difficult adjustment.

Hubby and I were talking last night about how we need to figure this new lifestyle out soon because the frantic pace of trying to keep up with everything is wearing us out! While I don't like the idea of accepting the splintered family evenings, I don't see much of a choice. Just the other day, we went up to the reservoir and had to swallow the bitter pill of leaving one of the girls behind because she had to work. It broke my heart. I want to ask my mom how she coped with this teenager-turning-adult transition? How do I let go of all the group activities and routines that I have carefully nurtured for 19 years now? It's not going to be easy!

For now, I am grateful to get what time I can with my family. This summer we have had wonderful moments of family barbecues, playing with the new watercraft, birthday parties and other backyard get togethers... but there haven't been nearly enough for my liking because we are also busy working our separate jobs, going our separate ways....

Slow down, Life...  Give me more time to treasure these precious days with my family.

Breaking in the new Waverunners:





Our Summer Garden:

 The screens, antique gardening tools and antique ladder all belonged to my beloved grandparents who also loved gardening.


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Babehs "My daughters are so many things- Tiny discoverers of butterfly wings, huggers of teddies, sweet sleepyheads, little ones to dream for in bright years ahead... All Special people who right from the start had a place in our family and of course in my heart. And just when I think that I've learned all the things that my dear daughters are and the joy each one brings, a hug or a grin comes with such sweet surprise that love finds me smiling with tears in my eyes!"

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