Suffragettes

New Zealand was the first self-governing country to grant women the vote; in 1893 all women over the age of 21 were permitted to vote in parliamentary elections. Women in South Australia achieved the same right in 1894 but became the first to obtain the right to stand (run) for Parliament. The National Union of Women's Suffrage Societies, which was founded in 1897, formed of a collection of local suffrage societies. This union was led by Millicent Fawcett, who believed in constitutional campaigning, like issuing leaflets, organizing meetings and presenting petitions. However this campaigning did not have much effect. So in 1903 Emmeline Pankhurst founded a new organization, the Women's Social and Political Union. Pankhurst thought that the movement would have to become radical and militant if it was going to be effective. The Daily Mail later gave them the name "Suffragettes".

A few historians feel that some of the suffragettes' actions actually damaged their cause. The argument was that women should not get the vote because they were too emotional and could not think as logically as men; their violent and aggressive actions were used as evidence in support of this argument.

We've come a long way, ladies!   

Further proof that my girls are adorable, amazing and awesome:

These lovelies voted for the first time today. And they went together, as loving sisters do. They cracked up over the fact that they voted at their old elementary school, finding it hard to believe they were once so little. 

Me too girlies, me too. 

Crazy Friday!

Friday was a blast! Okay, first I had to get through hubby getting called out of town to work, a dentist appointment (without numbing medicine..I'll explain in a sec), taking Linzie to the doc immediately following my dental appointment (which is why I skipped being awesomely numb...there simply wasn't time!), and standing in a super long line snaking through a parking lot to get my early vote in for this little thing called The Presidential Election.

Whew! 

But somewhere in the midst of all that chaos, I had THE. Best. Idea! My littlest girls have been eagerly anticipating the new Disney film called Wreck It Ralph. Since my work schedule has been screwed up for weeks (thanks, Delta!) I somehow managed to get an actual weekend off, which never ever happens, so I decided a movie would be the perfect thing for a fall Friday night and I invited my sis to bring her adorable kiddos too! Now keep in mind the life changes going on around here now that I have three girls in college.. I never plan on those girls being available to join us because they usually aren't. In keeping with current trends, I only bought tickets for Abby, Linzie and myself and then I announced it on Facebook. Haha! It wasn't long before I got a text from Madi saying she wanted to go too, so after returning from Linzie's doctor appointment, I bought another ticket.  After squeezing in the voting, it was nearly time to head to the movie...and that is when Carley got home from work and said she also really wanted to go to the movie. Just like Madi had done, Carley had some serious schedule rearranging to do in order to free up a few hours for the movie, but she managed it so I bought another ticket. :)  Poor Emily couldn't free up her schedule though so I was short one girlie as we headed off to the movie for some Friday fun. 

Missy's little man, Jack. We adore this boy!

Four of my very best friends! Carley, Linzie, Madi, and Abby. (we missed you, Emily!)

 Suffice it to say, that was probably the best movie I have seen all year and the company was fabulous! I loved hearing my girls laugh, and I got the honor of sitting by my adorable nephew, Jack, which added a whole new dimension to the experience! When the theater erupted in applause at the end of the movie, I felt the same way. Yes! It was magical! We talked about the movie and laughed all the way home. It was therapeutic. I had needed that night for a very long time!

My family is everything to me, more essential than air and more valuable than all the treasure in the world. How did I ever get so lucky? You can take away everything else, but as long as I have my girlies and my Hubby, I will always be happy. They are my everything. 

RIP Laptop (for now)

My laptop is dead. About a month ago the battery suddenly burst... talk about scary! The first rep I talked to with Apple completely freaked me out by telling me to immediately put the battery outside, as if it was going to suddenly explode completely. He then told me that I could go to the nearest Apple store and get a free replacement. I was so relieved! But before I could thank him for his help, he told me I would have to speak to his supervisor. After a few minutes, an abrupt woman came on the line and proceeded to interrogate me. Where was the laptop when the battery burst? (On my stomach.) Was I injured in any way? (Does mental trauma count?) Did I have any painful substance on my hands from touching the battery? (Um.. no, but now you're really freaking me out!) Had I scrubbed my exposed skin since handling the battery? (Seriously examining my skin at that point, wondering how much time I had left before it melted from my bones.) Was the computer case damaged? (Not that I could see.) Was anyone else in the vicinity when the battery burst? (Looking for ways to discredit my story? No witnesses makes it easy to deny my claim, right?) After about 5 minutes of in-depth questioning.. (covering their asses) the woman told me that this is "normal" for laptop batteries and that I should bring the laptop battery to one of their stores for disposal (for a fee, I might add) and then I would be welcome to purchase another battery for $189. WTF?! The last dude told me that I would be covered.. Futhermore, while you had me on hold I did a little research on my iPad and learned that a few years ago, Apple admitted these batteries were defective and had a battery replacement program. How about that?? Woman said no. Then she said no again. And just for good measure, she said no a third time.

Wow.

Thanks, Apple. Because of your "normal" battery, I now have almost no regular internet access. I can tell you that my Dell Laptop never.. I repeat, NEVER did such a "normal" thing! I've learned my lesson though. You can bet my next laptop will not be an Apple.

So.. I need to save for an overpriced laptop battery. But no matter how much I try to put money aside, things keep coming up to take that money away for other things. What things, you might ask?  Well, here's a few of the other items/people I have funded recently..

Abby and Linzie turned 16! Can you believe that? I would much rather spend money on their driver's licenses, birthday dinner, and presents than a silly laptop battery!

I loved their balloons this year! I had such a hard time convincing the clerks to let me have two bouquets. Did you know there is a world-wide helium shortage? It's true!

We took the girls to The Cheesecake Factory (a birthday favorite!) for Abby and Linzie's birthday dinner. Emily had to work.. :( so it was just Bill and I plus our two sets of twins. We died laughing when a group of waiters sang happy birthday to the WRONG set of twins! Judging by the picture here though, Carley didn't mind.









My adorable baby girls. Hard to believe they're so grown up! They are driving almost everywhere now and I'm so proud of how responsible they are! I just wish I could have even one more day with their bald baby heads. I don't know what I ever did in my life that was good enough to deserve these two!

Following close on the heels of the birthday was Abby and Linzie's orchestra fund raiser. Believe it or not, I bought $120 worth of chocolate bars from them.. which I see them nibbling on daily. Oh the things we do as parents to support our kiddos!

Birthdays and fundraisers were enough to delay the purchase of a new laptop battery, but then to add insult to financial injury, I found myself in need of an emergency dental procedure last week. I was traumatized because I have always taken such good care of my teeth! Once again, as quickly as I got my head above water, those tricky financial gods took it all away again.

So for now, the battery must wait. There's orchestra dresses to pay for, unexpected furniture purchases to pay off and those ever present medical and dental bills.  Being a grown up is so much fun! 

We Love More, Hope More, And Pray More...

I'm incredibly weepy lately. Work stress, lack of sleep, hormones out of whack.. whatevs. It doesn't take much to make me cry. So after days and days of living on the edge, this morning at work I got a series of text messages from my Carley that got me all sniffily at work, and for the rest of the day I found myself pondering the relationship between parent and child, which lead to a series of other events that kept me teary eyed pretty much all day.

I felt really bad that I missed her first text of the day. I was busy booking flights for Delta passengers! 

Carley is my sweet, stubborn, fiercely brave girl that can completely undo me with a smile.. or a quivering lip. She's very much like me in that she will let you know how she's feeling, even if she can't tell you exactly why she's feeling that way at the moment. I adore the fact that although she's nearly 20 years old, she's still not too old to snuggle with her mama.

Earlier this morning I had a conversation with my fav sister, Missy about a blog that we have been reading recently. The blog documents one family's incredibly short, incredibly painful, and shattering experience with childhood cancer. You can find that blog here: Rockstar Ronan. Between work calls today, I repeatedly found myself drawn to Ronan's blog. It wasn't long before my chest burned with heartache and I felt the tears swelling past the rims of my eyes. Bad idea to read that raw stuff at work. But I was captivated. Absolutely spellbound. I wanted to know more about Ronan's mom and how she handled this exquisitely private pain of losing her youngest child to cancer. I sent Missy a text about the blog... she told me she had made the mistake of reading it while working also. I'm telling you, once you start down that path, it's difficult to stop.

I told Missy through our texting how I hate cancer and how grateful I am for Lillie's super strong personality that helped her fight through Leukemia when she was such a tiny little girlie. I don't know why our family was spared the ultimate loss that so many of my friends have not been so lucky to escape. I can't believe that there is a God that spares some children while fracturing other families beyond repair. No mother deserves that kind of pain.

After sharing some comforting text messages with Missy, in which we both openly and lovingly admired each other, I kept wondering what it is that defines a good mother. Those thoughts are still winding around my mind this evening...

The common theme between the text messages Carley sent me, Missy's little girl battling cancer, and Ronan's mom caring for her precious boy as he fought bravely, is that we teach, coach and then show our children that we will always be right by their side as they face the challenges in their lives. Whether it's me teaching my girls that kindness matters and that no one ever regretted working hard to achieve their goals, or Missy successfully juggling home-work-family and her precious baby fighting cancer, or Ronan's mom who loved enough for a lifetime in four short years and then tenderly bathed her lifeless little boy one last time before he was taken away, kissing his eyes, his lips and cheeks over and over... whispering in his ear how loved he is and bravely sharing his story years later. Even after all of that, being a mom is still so much more. We love more, pray more, and hope more than these precious kids will ever understand... at least until they become parents themselves.

In the end, we all want our children to grow up to be happy, successful adults. I'm grateful for parents like Ronan's mom who may not get to see their own child(ren) grow up, but through their courage, wisdom and love, end up reaching thousands, if not millions of children all over the world. We love our children with every part of our souls... we are moms and that's a pretty cool club to belong to.


Side Note:

Taylor Swift also read the blog written by Ronan's mom and she was so moved by this family that she wrote a song for Ronan. The words of the song were taken directly from the blog and because of that, Taylor listed Ronan's mom as co-writer of the song. All proceeds from the sale of "Ronan" go directly to the Stand Up To Cancer foundation. Pretty darn cool! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go purchase my own copy. 

My Crazy Life

Fall is beginning all around me and I am easily reminded of why this is my favorite season. Last week, Hubby and I went to pick tomatoes at a local farm so I could start my fall tomato projects. It didn't take long before those bushels of tomatoes were turned into wonderful smells of chili sauce and spaghetti sauce cooking on my stove, to be safely tucked into glass jars that will line my pantry shelves for the winter. I still have a box of tomatoes sitting on my table, waiting for me to skin, slice and can them... I just ran out of steam today!

I'm running at least a week behind on my tomato projects because I was surprised with a work trip to Cincinnati. What a shock it was to be given the honor to represent my workplace on such an amazing trip! I'll admit that I was nervous to go, but I ended up in complete disbelief that I was being paid for so much rowdy fun with great coworkers I had met for the first time only days prior to the departing flight. We walked all over that city, exploring the sights and we may even have stalked a few famous football players at our hotel. (Drew Brees was adorably sweet even though I clearly didn't know his name while I was talking to him!)

The view from my hotel room on the 20th floor. 

It was wonderful to have new experiences and to get paid for going on a mini vacation, but I was happy to get home to my cute family who acted like they kind of missed me while I was gone. :) We laughed into the early hours of the morning as I recounted my Cincinnati adventures and I fell asleep snuggled up with my Hubby. Life is so good! 

My girlies are all back in school now. I realized that I actually have four sophomores this year! The oldest twins are college sophomores and the youngest twins are high school sophomores. Crazy! Although keeping up with them is still difficult to do, I am so proud of them every single day! They know that we have high expectations for them and they never disappoint.

My youngest twins, Linzie and Abby on their first day of high school. 

 

I might be exhausted and scatterbrained most days due to the demands of this busy busy family, but I wouldn't change it for anything! I'm married to a sweet guy who rocks the handyman skills, my girls are all successful over-achievers, and I have a stable job that pays me to do fun things. I'm so blessed!

Random photos taken recently:

A torrential rainstorm unleashed on us one evening. The rain was coming from every direction and we absolutely loved it!

After the rain, we were treated to a spectacular rainbow over our neighbor's house!

Two of my college students... Carley and Emily... mugging for the camera. I'm not sure they realize how beautiful they are!

Carley and Madi mugging for the camera while limiting Linzie to the bottom corner of the picture. Gotta love sisters!

I miss my blogging days.. I really do! I keep thinking if only I had more time.  I'm hoping to change that soon though... my new shift starts on October 1st and I will be working four ten-hour days which means three days off! I'm also hoping to sneak in a trip to Boston once I get the new routine ironed out! Mom and I can't wait to give Dottie a hug in person! Fingers crossed that I can make that happen in October!

Happy Birthday Aunt Dottie!

Dottie,

I just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you right this very minute (as I so often do). If you only knew how often we talk about you and if you could only see the smiles on our faces as we share memories and long for our next visit with you. We are so blessed to have you in our lives!

I'm certain you have a lot of wonderful things in store for you today so enjoy it to the fullest! You are a beautiful, wonderful lady and we love you oh so much! Have the happiest of birthdays!

Sending you all our love,
Bill, Nik and the six little girlies. 

Every Little Ting Is Gonna Be Alright

I think this is the first time I've turned my computer on in over a week. It's been that crazy in my life lately.  Overall I think things are starting to smooth out though and that's a huge relief. True, we have had some growing pains in our family recently, and the process involved some tears and several lengthy discussions, but my family always comes out of any adversity stronger than ever before.

Here are some things I've learned, or revisited recently:

• Letting go of being primary caretaker for my girls is a tough transition, but they are soaring! These beautiful girls have learned all the right lessons and I'm so proud of the way they steer their own lives. 
• Just because people assume I'm falling apart doesn't mean I have to make it true for them. 
• Sleep is very, very important! 
• Having a cell phone in my pocket while chasing a drifting waverunner off shore into waist deep water is not good for the phone. Submersion = loss of phone. 
• Putting waterlogged cell phone in a container of rice overnight is a lot like Dr. Frankenstein raising the dead.  It's ALIVE! 
• Karma is real. I've always known this, but it's nice to see that what goes around truly does come around, even if it takes years to do so. All the more reason to always do the right thing. 
• Having a sister that I can call and have a long, emotional conversation with is a lifesaver. 
• That saying, "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" is a bunch of crap! Words do hurt. Always choose your words carefully. 
• Having a day of outdoor fun is nice, but having a day of doing nothing is sometimes even better. 
• Gardening really does soothe the soul. 
• Cooking also eases my tension. I've been too tired to do a lot of creative cooking lately and I really miss it. 
• Taking the time to play games with my girls, even when I'm exhausted, is something I will never regret. I'm still thinking about a recent night of games with grins and giggles.. I doubt I'd still be thinking about going to bed early that night. 
• Sometimes people appear in your life and it feels as though they were meant to be there all along. Having friends that are more like family is precious.
• Nothing is more important than family. Nothing. 

A day of boating with my precious family. That's me, Carley and little Ty on the bow of the boat, Bill is driving and that's our dear friend, Brian's arm on the left. :) The other girls were sitting in the back of the boat. More pictures to come soon! 

Sunshine and Shadows

"Fake friends are like shadows: always near you at your brightest hour, 

but nowhere to be seen at your darkest moments."

I'm bugged. I realize that my stress level has been extremely high lately (and by that I mean for the last month) but today I broke. I have mentioned that Carley has some big news lately and I wasn't going to say anything because I didn't think it was my place... but Carley and I have been talking about it so I think it's ok to say it here... Carley has chosen to be baptized into the LDS church.  Although I have to face some of my old ghosts because of her choice, I understand that it is indeed her choice, and I love her more than I could love anyone or anything that isn't one of my girls. So Carley has my full support. She always has and she always will.

What has me bugged then? People coming out of the woodwork to attend her baptism day when those people seldom have anything to do with our family on any other day. We have extended invitations to these people for our dinner parties, our camping trips, and other celebrations such as graduations and birthdays and the same people are always conspicuously absent from any of our events (and not once have we been invited to do anything with them). We know who won't show up to something we have planned, but most of the time we extend the invitations anyway. Over the years we have come to accept that maybe we aren't up to their standards or maybe they just don't want to have any sort of friendship with us. Needless to say, certain family gatherings always have a chill to them. The fact that these people are now falling all over themselves to attend Carley's baptism adds evidence to the theory that we don't measure up for them. I should be glad that they are supporting my brave girl, but instead we had a conversation tonight about how strange it is that certain people decide to be supportive now.  Strange and fake.

I wish I had the courage to tell them that my family is strong without their support. We have managed as an island of our own creation - our family of eight, with plenty of support for one another and none of us questions the loyalty of any of the others. We show up. We support each other through good times and bad times. We celebrate successes both large and small. And we make sure to let our family members know how loved and appreciated they are. Every day.

Showing up for a church event once does not make you supportive. It makes you fake. We see through the charade and we know that the motive is to be seen by others at the event. If you want to support my family, then do so every day. Support Ashley when she has open heart surgery. Support Madi when she has surgery on her foot. Support Emily's graduation or many artistic talents. Support Abby and Linzie for being named students of the year or show up for one of their concerts and witness their beautiful musical talent. Support Carley for being fantastic and making life altering choices on her own for the past year that had nothing to do with church. What? Too busy to support these other things? Or is it because none of those things involved your church?

I'm sure they will all be there next week, dressed in their fine clothes, congratulating each other for being supportive and gushing about how wonderful Carley is. Yes, she is wonderful. And so are her sisters. It's a shame those fake friends couldn't be bothered to find that out for themselves.

Hanging In There

I was just thinking how I spend all my time mothering, coaching and encouraging my little women. There's nothing I wouldn't do for them or help them with, and I certainly would not let them feel the weight of the world alone. It's ironic that I was allowing myself to feel alone and overwhelmed. I did not mean to let that happen.

I'm still working through hard things. I'm still overwhelmed and exhausted, beaten down and lost. I still fear the big changes happening around me and some days I wish I could just hide away from it all. But my favorite person in the world sent me a reminder this week just when I needed it most. I will hang on to that encouragement and I know that these trials will pass. I won't be the same person at the conclusion of these events, but I can hope to be stronger for enduring them.  I will be okay.

Love you, Dottie. I wish I could give you a big hug. You are so special to me!

Another Day, Another Surgery

Madi is holding up like a champ! Yesterday she had surgery to remove what we think was a cyst from her foot. The surgeon originally thought it was multiple cysts or tumors, but once they were in the operating room they discovered it was one giant cyst and they had to adjust their plan accordingly. Needless to say, my girl ended up with a much larger incision than we bargained for, and she's already sick of being limited to the couch, but I'm proud of how she is handling her discomfort so far. The doctor told me she woke up from the sedation smiling and she's managed to keep her good mood ever since.

I wish I could say the same about me. If a surgeon could cure me of this ongoing issue then I'd be running for the OR. Instead, I keep waiting for this gloomy funk to disappear. I want to find a way to be ok with the stresses in my life. I just can't seem to get there and I can see it is taking a toll on everyone around me. Tonight I secluded myself in my bedroom for some alone time because I couldn't smooth my rough edges enough. If I was a clam, I'd be busy making one hell of a pearl from this constant irritation. 

I need something... I just can't figure out what it is.

Hoping For A Light At The End Of The Tunnel

Allow me to finally clarify what that last post was about. I was struggling with the huge decision of either going to Atlanta when Ashley had her open heart surgery, or staying out of the ex wife drama zone and staying home with my girls. In the end, I went.. but it wasn't without drama before leaving, and it wasn't without drama once I was there. It was honestly one of the hardest things I have ever had to do and I'm not sure any of us would handle it the same way again.

Hubby waits by her bedside in ICU, hours after her open heart surgery.

Day three, this girl walked out of the hospital to head home!

But the good news is that Ashley is doing fantastic! You wouldn't guess this girl had her chest opened a matter of weeks ago. She was showing us her tough side hours after surgery and she continues to amaze us every day. I do wish her mother wouldn't be so neurotic though. There were moments when Hubby and I couldn't believe the things she would say or do. Poor Ashley! She has to live with constant paranoia created by her own mother. I wish it could be different, but I have no say in it and that is one of the major reasons for the huge struggle I have where Ashley is concerned.



Now it's time for the other hard part. The work grind to pay back the time and money I used to go to Atlanta. It's tough! Even my girls are making sacrifices as we stay home instead of doing fun summer things, and I give up weekend after weekend to pay back work hours. It's not fun for anyone. 

You know the saying, "When it rains, it pours?" We found out last week that Madi has to have surgery to remove cysts or tumors from her foot. We won't know what they are exactly until after the lab results come back following the surgery.  I know what you're thinking.....Really?? Can't we just get a friggin' break? Nope. I swear if we didn't have bad luck, we'd have no luck at all.  Madi's surgery is scheduled for Tuesday and I gave up more weekends to make sure I can be there with her. I sure hope she lets me know what time the surgery is though because I had a harsh reality check when the surgical center refused to talk to me because she is nineteen. *SLAP!*  That's what that particular phone call felt like.  My girl graduates and I get a little teary but I handle it ok.. she is out late working or hanging out with friends and I find a way to manage.. but some desk nurse says she can't talk to me about my own daughter???  This, folks, is where I fell to pieces! She really is an adult and I really need to step back. How to make that transition though is another matter entirely. She still lives in my house so I'm still the parent. Right?

Carley is also making BIG HUGE FREAKING DECISIONS all on her own and I have to swallow that panic about 200 times every day. It's not my news to reveal though so I can't go into detail here. I never envisioned this path for her, having left that particular path behind in my own life a long time ago,  but I support her choosing her own way and I hope for the strength to be ok with it in my own head.

A therapist would have a field day with me.. not even kidding!

If you see me and my eyes are all watery and my nose is red, don't worry. Life is kicking my butt right now but Hubby tells me it has to get better sometime in the future. And I've got my Littles here taking excellent care of their teary mother as well.

It's good to cry, right? 

Mental and Emotional Battles

This is a tough week for our family and it comes on the heels of such a wonderful, momentous week. Life has a sense of humor, doesn't it?  One week we are giddy and celebrating and now we find ourselves quiet, withdrawn and very serious as we prepare for an event that is completely out of our control - one that we are 99.9% certain will have a good outcome... but that tiny percent sure wreaks havoc on our fragile emotions.

Complicating matters is my own heart/head combination. My heart knows what is right but my head is confused and afraid and it tells me that there is more than one right answer... but which one is more right? I don't know.. and the mental tug-of-war is making me more than a little difficult to live with, I'm sure.

How exactly does a person make decisions between two situations that are both right, depending on how you look at it, but each choice also has difficult, painful consequences at the same time?

Tough. And I still don't have the answer.

(Please keep our girl, Ashley, in your thoughts and prayers this week. I'm sure it will all turn out well, but extra prayers are always appreciated.)

Two More Days

It's hard to believe this little girl is graduating from high school in two days.. where did the time go? Emily is my only child that did not come with a twin. I have often joked with her that it is because I could only handle one child with the amount of energy she has. What a beautiful young lady she has grown up to be!

Emily, as you begin your journey into adulthood, never forget how special you are! I fought diligently to protect your unique qualities when you were little and oh-so-energetic! I told everyone that you have a special purpose and I was determined that no one would squash the spirit in you. I hope that you will continue to protect it as I have done. Keep your dreams alive and never sacrifice who you are by bending to the ideas of what other people think you ought to be.  Emily, I love the way you care for other people around you. When you see someone hurting, you are right there with one of your "nose kisses" to remind that person they are loved, and your hugs are one of the highlights of my life! You are such a beautiful young woman... inside and out! I am so proud to be your mom and I can't wait to see what wonderful things you do next!

Congratulations on your upcoming graduation, sweet girl - I love you, my precious Emmy!

Mother's Day 2012

This day is about all the days that came before. Every memory of summer and sunrise, golden evenings spent in the gardens, children and laughter, and even my own childhood. To me, Mother's Day isn't just about being grateful for Mom on one day of the year.. it's about being grateful for all of the memories that have created the person I am and the mother in me that is now passing those experiences on to my girls.

This morning I woke up to the sound of eggs cracking, the dishwasher being unloaded and then loaded again and the stove and oven both making busy good morning noises as my littles prepared a nice breakfast - not just for me, but for everyone in the family. I couldn't help but think of one of my very favorite story books from when I was a child. The book is Just For You by Mercer Mayer.

How adorable and perfectly fitting is that! In years past, I have managed to eat burned toast and overcooked eggs with shell bits while smiling and thanking my Little Women for their kindness. And every year I thought of the two images above. You can't overcook kindness. Having said that, I am happy to report that my girls' cooking has greatly improved over the years!

It simply would not be Mother's Day without flowers. My mom taught me to love and appreciate gardening from the time I was old enough to plant marigolds with a kitchen spoon taking the place of a garden shovel. I also have many memories of church musical performances that honored mothers. "I often go walking in meadows of clover. And I gather arm fulls of blossoms of blue. I gather the blossoms, the whole meadow over.  Dear Mother, all flowers remind me of you." Okay, I'm a little choked up as I just sang that verse in my head. After singing to the mothers in church, the little primary children would then hand out little potted flowers to every mother standing. I cherish those memories.

Now that I have grown and nearly grown children of my own, we also love to garden and sing. We may not be performing in church but we have our own rituals and things we cherish doing together. Recently, my girls and I planted our spring gardens. After all the new annuals are planted, we love to stand back and admire our hard work. What makes it even better is knowing that the plants will continue to grow and provide new, spectacular colors until fall. I have my mom to thank for my love of gardening.. and I must confess, this year was the first year that we actually bought enough shovels for everyone to have an actual garden tool instead of kitchen spoons. I think I just might miss those spoon-shovels.

Our absolute favorite oasis during the summer!

I love my Peter Rabbit garden that my Sweetheart built for me. The rabbit over the entryway was a gift from Mom.

The best part is that we still have lots of planting to do! I just have to get more funds to hand over to the local nurseries in order to feed my gardening addiction! I will have to take pictures of our beautiful potted plants as well. We are often told by our friends and family that they love summer gatherings in our beautiful, flowery backyard. Me too, my friends, me too!

I'm a very grateful and proud mama today and every day. I feel like I should be celebrating the little girls that gave me the title of Mother. They inspire me each and every day. I find myself thinking that I want to be just like them when I grow up... I always wish I could have been more like them when I was their age. My own mother, and my little women are the people who define me. I am so lucky to have all of them in my life!

Happy mother's day to each and every mother and family! Cherish family time and build memories that will last a lifetime.

I know I have.

Boston!

Two people I love with every part of my soul are in Boston (Norwood actually) right this very minute, visiting a third person I love with every part of my soul.

I'm completely jeally! I wish I could be there with those ladies, for my heart is always in Massachusetts.

You three have a wonderful time, and Hubby says, "Go have breakfast at the Brookside Cafe!"

My Daughter The Singer/Songwriter

Two blog posts in less than 24 hours? That must be some kind of record for me lately! The reason for tonight's madness is all about Emily. This girl of mine has some crazy amazing talent and I just couldn't wait to share it!  The first song she wrote and dedicated to my adorable niece Ty.. while I'm not sure of the inspiration for the second song, it's just as lovely to hear her sing it.

Click the links and hear why I'm such a proud mama!

Ty's Lullaby - By Emily Randquist
I Remember - By Emily Randquist

A Mother's Kindness Is The Most Important

One of my oldest girls recently took a trip to Texas to work with her father on videoing a conference. Oh how I missed her while she was gone! I send her off on these excursions with great trepidation because we know there will be difficult challenges at best, and if worst comes to pass, she could be alone and facing danger.  I won't get into details of past conference experiences here, but suffice it to say that my heart sent out a constant plea of "please keep her safe" the entire time she was away.

I was relieved that Madi had a good time at the conference and that she was able to manage the slight hardships she experienced while she was away. When she returned home last night, we were all grins and giggles as we played catch up, exchanging stories of events that occurred while she was away. One of those exchanges still has me thinking today... so much so that I had to put it into words here.

Madi told me how she overheard one side of a phone conversation in which a mother was yelling at her young child for crying about cotton candy that was taken from her by her older brother. Madi's cheerful countenance became serious and her eyes grew sad as she told me how she felt it just wasn't right for the mother to behave that way. I thought about it for a minute before I agreed that it wasn't the best parenting skills that she witnessed, but I also explained to her that mothering is a difficult job, one of the most difficult in life, and it can become a hardship when a mother is left to raise children mostly on her own.

Today I find myself still thinking about that conversation and how it relates to the past experiences of my little family. I won't say that I was a single mother, because I was married most of the years that my children were young. However, I was physically and emotionally alone most of the time. When my young daughters were having difficult days, I was the one who had to calm them and discipline when necessary. Of course, the upside of this is that I was the one who claimed most of the hugs, kisses and snuggles too. I remember very clearly the day that I wrote P A T I E N C E in purple crayon across the front of my freezer door so that I would have a visual reminder as I tended to my active children throughout the day. I cannot remember the events of the day or exactly what I was feeling, but something inside of me knew that I needed a strong visual reminder when my last nerve began to fray.

To this day, I keep that visual memory of P A T I E N C E in my mind. I may not be a young mother any more, but I do know that children are the most precious of all gifts and that a mother is their first and best champion throughout their lives. A mother's job is to soothe and calm the child whenever it is needed. It isn't always easy, especially in today's world where days are hectic and nerves fray easily, but I know firsthand what happens when a child feels alone and helpless and I vowed that would never happen to my girls.

Kindness matters.

I want my girls to understand that laundry can wait, the household chores can be put off a little while longer, but never... ever put off hugging or loving a child who needs you. Time, just like children, is precious.. and once it is gone, no matter how desperately we wish we could go back and change it, we can never get those moments back.

Make every moment count, my sweet girls. One day you will be mothers with families of your own and your patience and kindness will be rewarded in your children's love and laughter.  Be the champion and safe haven for others, especially children.

Always.

Inspiration From My Girl

I'm sitting here talking with my girlie, Carley, on her day off. This girl really makes life fun. Everywhere she goes, she makes people smile, laugh and feel better about themselves and life in general. I am so lucky I get to be her mom!

I have often said that my girls teach me more than I teach them. I know the reality of it is that we teach each other, but I always feel like I get the better end of the deal somehow. Since Carley graduated from high school, she has really blossomed. Adulthood suits her. Every day she comes home with tales of work and friends, almost always laughing, and I think to myself, "She's got everything figured out. She's going to be just fine." That's a great feeling for a mom, knowing that this little girlie of mine is happy and doing the right things. She's got life by the horns and she's rockin' it! So even if I still feel overprotective of her and cringe when she tells me she's taking a California road trip with friends, I take a deep breath and remind myself how responsible she is... and I do my best to let my little birdie fly.

Carley started a new blog a while ago and once again she amazes me. Her writing is artistic and her words are beautiful. I'm sharing it here today because I'm really proud of all she has accomplished.  Click the link below to experience her words for yourself.

Thirty 33 Three Pounds - By Carley Randquist

California- Day Two

I am coming to terms with the fact that I rarely (if ever) have time to myself. I think about coming here every day to complete the vacation story and update about every day events, but it is nearly impossible to find the time. Having said that, I found some time this morning, at the expense of spending time with Hubby, and I am currently considering not going to work today so I can write and take my girls to the new Chimpanzee movie. I'll let you know how that thought turns out. In the meantime, let's get on with the California adventure.

Day two we woke up to a winter wonderland. We were still giggling about the fact that we were in California and there was more snow on the ground than we had seen all winter in Utah! With one shower for four people, three of us being girls that then needed additional time for hair and makeup, it took time to get our party out the door in the mornings. We pushed ourselves hard to be out the door by 9am each day. So much for sleeping in and relaxing on vacation! After a hilariously entertaining April Fool's joke where I managed to burglarize Hubby's suitcase while he was in the shower and thereby convince him that he had forgotten to pack any underwear, we said goodbye to our Tahoe room with the too-small beds and headed out for breakfast.

After breakfast it was time to head down the mountain to prove to the girlies that we really were in California. Hubby's mom lives near Tahoe so we planned a quick stop to say hello. We also visited a cute little produce stand which reminded me of Walker Farms in Vermont, just not quite as cute. I was in awe of all of the orchards surrounding us, easily imagining how wonderful it must smell in the fall when the apples were ripe and the cider mill was operating. In fact, it was so chilly that it could have been October! Hubby and the girls strapped the apple wood we purchased for barbequing  to the top of the Jeep and we headed to a little sandwich place for lunch. I couldn't believe how quickly time was getting away from us. It was nearly 3pm by the time we got back on the road! 

The girlies settled into their sleepy time for the long car ride and I soaked up the sights all around me. We saw miles and miles of orchards which Hubby and I had fun trying to identify as we sped past them. Olives, pistachios, apples, and many other fruit trees lined the highway for hours. The photographer in me wanted to stop for a photo shoot. Sadly, we never did. 

Redding was our next stop on the California tour. Hubby had learned of a sundial bridge there and we were eager to see it. After spending nearly 4 hours in the car, we were ready to stretch our legs! The sun was setting over the Sacramento river as we gaped at the massive bridge that seemed more like an art piece to me. It was a foot traffic only bridge and we had plenty of company! Walnut trees surrounded the river banks and I kept saying over and over how fresh the air was there. Clearly I had been trapped in Utah's winter inversion air for much too long. I had forgotten what fresh air could smell like! We stayed at the bridge until the sun had nearly set and we felt rejuvenated once more.  Now for the tough part of our day.. we had to get to Eureka through the 130 miles of twisty mountain road. We had no idea what we were in for! 

Linzie does a back bend trying to capture the curve of the sun dial.

The first part of our mountain drive to Eureka was beautiful! We were treated to amazing views and sweet smelling air. The sun setting over Whiskeytown Lake was nothing short of breath-taking! We turned around to go back to a scenic overlook so we could take pictures of the lake sunset. The pictures turned out beautiful even though we were frozen to the bone from the icy wind that was howling around us! 

This tree was so amazing! I have never felt bark so smooth, nor have I seen such color! I wanted to take it home!

 

 

After 10 minutes of photo time at Whiskeytown Lake, we were frozen to the core and we were so happy to get inside the warm Jeep! Little did we know what awaited us over the next 3+ hours. So far in our trip we had seen mighty dust storms, fierce winds, heavy winter snow, and Mother Nature wasn't done with us yet. Almost as soon as night fell upon us, the rain started. I'm not sure I have mentioned this before, but I am also night blind. I am so grateful my capable Hubby was behind the wheel, keeping us safe. It seemed as if the winding canyon roads would never end! I was unnerved by the winding roads in the pouring rain, in conditions which I could not see... it was one of the longest drives of my life but we made it safely to Eureka sometime past 10pm and it did not take us long to fall asleep. I wish I had taken pictures of our hotel room in Eureka because it also turned out to be our very favorite room of the entire trip! The beds were super comfy and the room was nice and clean. Ahhhh! What an exciting adventure we were on! 

Day three was our trip through the giant redwoods. I don't recall ever having seen trees that ginormous before! Stay tuned! 

My Latest Excuse...

I came home from work the other night (approximately 30 minutes past midnight) and my girlies were fast asleep, Hubby was waiting up for me with a nice cocktail to share, and together we watched the season premiere of Deadliest Catch. As I sat there shedding every ounce of my work stress, I was overwhelmed by a sense of being perfectly content. I imagined I could feel my sweet baby girls breathing in and out, the deep breathing of peaceful sleep... then I imagined the house itself was breathing in perfect unison with my precious Little Women.

I liked that feeling. A lot.

My family is every single one of my dreams come true. Every day. So please forgive me if I haven't yet posted more details about our California trip. You see, I have been busy enjoying my family. My heart overflows.

I promise I will work on the road trip updates. In the meantime, don't you think these faces are adorable?

California Road Trip - Day 1

Before I get into details about our road trip, I wanted to take a moment to express my gratitude for my wonderful family on this beautiful Easter day. My Hubby and my little women are everything I always wanted in life -A group of my own that is filled with love and kindness. They are my shelter, my heart and soul. I am honored to be mother to my beautiful girls who make me proud every single day. I have watched them grow up before my eyes and even though they are forging lives of their own now, I still see them as my little ones. I hear their little voices and I see their childhood expressions on their faces every day. How did I ever get to be so blessed? Memories are my treasures and I will always hold on tightly to every single one that my girls have given me. I love this little family of mine!  Happy Easter!


The Road Trip

I had worked until midnight the night before, but we were eager to get started on our road trip so I dragged myself out of bed to get dressed and finish packing. Honestly, I'd love to tell you details about the morning, but I was walking around in a fog.. and those memories are just gone. I do remember saying goodbye to Carley, Madi and Emily. Leaving my three oldest girls home made my heart hurt. Who would laugh at my intellectual jokes? Who would keep us laughing with blonde-isms? And who would kiss our noses?  Leaving those girls home alone was torture to me.. we would have some mighty fun shoes to fill.
I prepared my iPod with new music and three audio books that I thought might entertain us. I think we opted for singing along with music for the first part of the day. There was a storm blowing in and the winds were starting to pick up. I remember thinking how lucky it was that we were getting started early - before the brunt of the storm showed up.

Before we knew it, we were on the south side of the Great Salt Lake and the winds were fierce! I pointed out the old Saltair resort to the girls and told them a brief history of its former glory. It wasn't too long after that landmark that the scenery became nothing but blowing dirt and we settled in to our road trip groove. I was still groggy and the howling wind made me nervous, but I tried to relax and let the hum of the tires lull me into a calm place.

I had been telling my family for years about the strange sculpture tree out in the desert near Wendover. I remember people talking about it when I was a teenager. No one could figure out the motive for the sculpture, just that some rich artist wanted to create something huge and place it in the desert. Some people consider it atrocious, others find it curiously interesting. I saw it once when I was eighteen and I have been wondering if it was still there. I kept an eye on the desert for the "tree" so I could point it out to the girls. Just when I was beginning to think the strange sculpture was no longer standing, something very large appeared on the edge of my vision. I watched the shape grow larger and excitedly told everyone in the car that the sculpture was still standing.

The picture doesn't do it justice. This thing is HUGE! It also looks broken to me.. are those pieces on the ground part of the exhibit or did they fall from the sculpture? Your guess is as good as mine. One thing is for sure though.. I still have no idea what this sculpture is supposed to represent!

Our first official stop on our road trip was at the Bonneville Salt Flats.  I can't remember ever visiting that state park and I know it was a first for Hubby and the littles as well. My eyes weren't prepared for the blinding white glare from miles of salt stretched out before us. It seems to be quite the hot spot for taking photographs though.. we even saw a very bearded man dressed up in a woman's dress and high heels getting his... (her?) pictures done out on the salt flats. We ventured out into the howling wind for some photos of our own.

Huge chunks of salt were everywhere!

Our lovely Jeep

Linzie standing in salt crystals

Linzie and Abby at the Salt Flats... cute girls!

Abby found a giraffe puppet in a gas station to send a hello to Carley

Our next stop was in Wendover to gas up and grab some car snacks. We were already shocked over how much higher the gas was in Wendover. I could only imagine how much higher it would be once we reached California. Wendover wasn't as impressive as I remembered it being. It was also getting very dusty from the relentless wind. Needless to say, we didn't stay long before heading back to the road. We had 11 hours of driving to get through on day one and we hadn't even scratched the surface yet!

It wasn't long after we left Wendover that the questioning began. "How much longer until we're there?" My girls were not used to extremely long car rides.. we fly to our vacation destinations. I knew we were in for a long day as I patiently tried explaining the long day ahead to the littles.

The wind continued to batter us as we drove along the highway. Once we hit the Nevada desert, everything around us seemed to disappear into dusty nothingness. I was so grateful that the driving was in Hubby's capable hands. I watched the muscles in his arms bulge as he fought to keep the Jeep on a straight path.. more than once his knuckles turned white as he tightened his grip on the steering wheel. At that point I was not having much fun. I'm a nervous passenger anyway, and the wind nearly undid me.

Abby gives up and takes a nap

We listened to our audio books and looked at maps.. and when the littles couldn't take the monotony any more, they napped. We kept saying that day one was a day that we just had to get through so we could start enjoying the rest of the trip. Just. Get. Through. It! Everything changed when we reached Carson City, Nevada. The temperature dropped like a rock and that's when the snow started to fall...

A tunnel we went through before we reached Carson City

A tunnel we went through after Carson City! What a difference a few hours made! 

I'll be the first to admit that I was not expecting to see snow on this California trip. The morning we left, the weatherman said it was going to be the warmest day of the year, so I was wearing flip flops! I knew my footwear decision had been the wrong one when I saw all the cars pulled over to put their snow chains on.. those people were all decked out in ski gear. What was I thinking?!

We had seen it all during that day. Warm summer-like temperatures, howling winds, bright sunshine, dust storms that blocked out the sun.. and now we had also seen a foot of snow getting deeper by the second. What an adventure!

We made it to our hotel, checked in and unpacked our suitcases. After changing our shoes (stepping out of the Jeep into a foot of snow while wearing flip flops was not fun!) we headed back to a casino for dinner. We all agree that was the best dinner we had the entire trip! We enjoyed Filet Mignon, crab and shrimp, prime rib, mac and cheese for the littles, salads and every kind of dessert they could taste. Of course we could never eat it all, but we enjoyed sampling a bit of everything!

We had a brief scare when we left the casino parking lot. The Jeep was sliding sideways when Hubby was backing out of the parking stall. We came within an inch of slamming into the vehicle parked next to us. I still don't know how we made it out of that near disaster, but I am so thankful for the angels watching over us and for Hubby's driving skills that kept us, and the Jeep, safe!

Day one was over and we fell into bed.. completely exhausted and giggling over the fact that the snow was still falling. We had no idea what the next day would bring...

Day ONE!