Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Tweety Birds

Tweeting used to mean something entirely different when I was a kid. Undoubtedly, it meant that summer vacation was upon us and if I could hear "tweeting" then I'd overslept my crack of dawn internal alarm clock and I needed to get moving because 7AM means get outside and have some fun! I'd leave the house right after breakfast and not be seen again by my family unit until dusk. All you children of the 70's know what I'm talking about. Am I right, or what?

But not now. Nope. Nuh uh. Play outside? But it's c-uh-old out there!

The70's happened a long time ago and these days birds are for the birds, if you know what I mean. So what exactly does tweeting mean in our modern technopia?

Wikipedia has redefined the word for us uber technical modern types.
Tweet: A micro-blog post on the Twitter social network site, or the act of posting on it. Each post is referred to as a tweet, and the act of sending a tweet is referred to as tweeting.

Look out, Tweety Bird, you're so old school!

There are some days when I have pretty decent conversations with my kiddos via tweets and I am actually grateful to know what's up with them. When you think about it, it's pretty genius. In 140 characters, or less, tell the world what's up with you. 140 because in our fast paced world of "gotta get there like 5 minutes ago, so hand me another latte and stand back" if you go beyond your word limit then you're talking to someone's vapor trail.

Just think about the time that could be saved and put to better use if corporate meetings were conducted by tweets! And how about that State of the Union Address coming up tomorrow? Twitter politics anyone? Thanks for the brief tweet, President Obama, now back to our regularly scheduled programming!

Nice. A girl can dream!

Seriously though, I was just pondering how this bit of technology has changed my personal life and brought my kids closer to me throughout the day as we each go about our own daily patterns. We even communicate with Ashley, in Georgia, on a regular basis via Twitter! Beyond that, there's a completely different layer to how Twitter affects my daily life because I happen to work for an Online High School that uses Twitter in a professional capacity. Very cool!

So tweet away! The day has started and there's information that NEEDS to be exchanged. What are you up to? What interesting things have you seen today? Have YOU squished a spider on your locker lately? If so, the world wants to know about it!

A sampling from my Tweet collection:

BinzaBear- Strawberry orange banana smoothie! Yum! :p

mads_the_kat- Calculus hurts my brain.

BinzaBear- Just had to squish a spider on my locker... I am now grossed out... Ewww

JayBabeAbby- I got a 4.0 for the first time in my life! :D

Shlaberry3- Watching the lion king 1 1/2 in science because we are learning about producers and consumers :) yay

Artistryomen213- The crayola slipped into my prismacolors when I wasnt looking! Rude!

mads_the_kat- I love the way my hands smell after peeling an orange.

Nikole928- Brightly colored helium balloons = Happiness :)

AgonyInEcstasy- @postsecret Just what I've always wanted, a toaster I can check facebook on!

Shlaberry3- Just accidentally ate an ant HOLY NOMILICIOUSNESS!

Artistryomen213- I am completely amused. The newspaper class decided that they want a pet goldfish. The teacher said yes.

Nikole928- Spending the day with my little girl at PCMC for her cardiology check up. An amazing girl, and an amazing team of docs. Life. Is. Good!

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

The Roots Run Deep

Type .. Backspace. Type.... Backspace. Type.... Backspace. ....

There are just no words to describe what we are feeling, what we have been through, what we have lost. I am so proud to be their granddaughter, mother of five of their great-granddaughters. Yet nothing can change the fact that every day without them hurts.
Sunday we gathered for a family memorial service. This time I did not hesitate. I went right over to him and put my hand gently on top of his. I struggled against the tears and the choked back sobs, consciously avoiding letting my tears stain his perfect suit.

He looked restful, finally at peace. His gentle hands rested on top of the towel that was placed there so lovingly. I noticed the toothpick in his suit pocket and smiled to myself as countless memories washed over me. I easily recalled images of him smiling, with a toothpick in his mouth, at one of our many summer cookouts, sitting at the kitchen table laughing, or walking amongst his roses. He was never without a toothpick to clutch in his teeth or twirl around in his fingers.

And there was the pin.

I had never seen it before, and that glossy red pin might as well have been pinned to my heart. A symbol of his life in the railroad industry, I held my breath at the sight of it pinned to his lapel. My broken heart swelled with pride. How I love that man!

As a family we stood together and cried, paid our last respects, and occasionally we laughed as we shared memories and worked hard to hold each other up. We know he is happy, but we mourn our loss nonetheless.

Monday dawned gray, cloudy (Just like another day in August) and cold. We commented on how the snow falling on that morning was like a gift to us, as the August rain had been not so long ago. As we approached the cemetery, it became difficult to breathe. There would be no happy ending for any of us that day.

I will always remember looking up and seeing tiny angels adorning the pine boughs above the graves. The sun peeked out from behind the clouds as we began to sing quiet, tearful tributes of "Home on the Range" and "I've Been Working on the Railroad."

How is it possible for a broken heart to break over and over again?
We crowded together, possibly for the last time, in my Grandparents' house that afternoon. There was an endless amount of love, heartbreaking tears, and even some much needed laughter. I'm certain Grandma and Grandpa would have approved. Well, except for the part about all of us exploring the forbidden basement.

I walked through the house with my husband and my girls, silently saying goodbye to the structure that housed so many wonderful childhood memories. I carefully photographed the house, the walls, the windows, anything that would help me to keep those memories alive forever.

It hurts to say goodbye.


The Robinson legacy is mighty and as his memorial program so eloquently pointed out,our roots run deep. I am so grateful for the rich heritage I have been given and for the love that this family exudes. Now it is time to carefully preserve their history by writing and retelling their stories so that we will always have them near.

I will nag if I have to.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Happy Anniversary!

Seven years ago today, I married my best friend. Sometimes it seems like yesterday, other times it feels as if it were a lifetime ago. The truth is that it is both because I still have a crush on my guy and yet our relationship has grown to be much stronger than it was back then.
Over the last seven years, the love and respect has deepened and we both understand, better than ever before, that marriage is something we have to work at every day.

To my sweet husband I want to say thank you for being my best friend, my strength and my love. I treasure our time together, whether it is kicking your butt at Mario Kart, watching our favorite TV shows, or exploring the outdoors through travel and camping. You are a wonderful father to all of the girls and I am forever grateful that you had the courage to take on such a group! I adore our family.

I promise to always love you(even on the days when I might not "like" you)and I look forward to many more years together. Seven years of marriage and we are just getting started!

I love you, my Sweetheart. Happy Anniversary!

Thursday, January 14, 2010

A Whistle in the Distance

I searched through hundreds and hundreds of train images to find one that struck just the right emotion. With help from the girls, we transformed it from a dull colored image to one that we feel is pretty cool. I didn't know what his last words were when we were creating this image, but I've since been told that the last thing he said was,"Did you hear that?" as a train whistled in the far off distance. I will never again hear a train whistle without thinking of you, Grandpa. And although the distance may be vast, we'll catch up don't you worry.

This is our tribute to an incredible man who is now waiting up around the bend for us. Grandpa, part of my heart went with you when you left but I know you will take good care of it until we meet at the next station.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Forever In Our Hearts

He asked who the person was that was standing in the corner, though no one could be seen. He said he had to go find her, his one true love. I know she was waiting for him. She prepared the way and he followed. It will be a joyous party, Grandpa, so many people have been waiting for you!
Though our hearts are broken and we selfishly wish we could keep you here with us, we find comfort knowing that you are now our Patriarch Guardian Angel. We mourn our loss while celebrating your triumph.
Give our love to Grandma, tell her how much we have missed her, and be happy together. I love you with all my heart... save me a spot.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Forty Six Seconds After Midnight




Four or five years ago Emily went on a youth camping trip and I was asked to write her a letter that she would be given on the last night around the campfire. Unfortunately, the leaders goofed and didn't give her the letter that night. It still hurts me to think of my little girl sitting around that fire, watching the other girls read their letters from their parents, thinking she didn't have one. I can imagine her making some light comment about how she was fine, it is all right, etc. Emily is like that. She keeps her emotions hidden, for the most part, unless it is happiness or abundance, and those she simply has too much of to keep bottled up and is almost always bouncy, happy and silly.

I digress.

Anyway, when Em came home from that camping trip, I couldn't wait to hear what she thought of her letter because I had poured my heart out to her in it. For a split second I saw sadness in her eyes when she said, "What letter? I didn't get one." I was mad! I started calling leaders until I found the person who admitted she had the letter and had forgotten to give it to Emily when the rest of the girls were all enjoying their own letters from home. I arranged to have it brought to our house and I gave it to Emily myself, which is the best way to deliver such sentiment anyway! Emily read the letter and I could tell she appreciated what I said about her in it. It made me so happy!

But there's more to the story of the letter.

Not that long ago, Carley lost her phone and we were helping her search the house for it. Since Carley and Emily are best buddies, I thought that Emily's room was the likely place it would be found. I searched the floor, the nightstand, the top of the dresser, and then I decided to start shaking out the bed, one blanket at a time. Keep in mind that this mom does not make beds for the girls. They have been in charge of their own domains since they were old enough to understand consequences for chores left undone. Needless to say, I had not had any reason previously to move Emily's pillows. But on that day, when I moved her pillows to the floor, I was stunned. There under her pillow, was the letter that I had written her years before. Just writing about it chokes me up! My little girl placed so much importance on my thoughts and words that she kept them in the place where they would be near her while she dreamed. How's that for sentiment? I may have written the letter, but Emily turned it into a treasure.

That's my girl. She is completely amazing in the way she continually surprises me. She has this goofy exterior that keeps people guessing about what is going on inside. But I know the truth. She has a heart of gold and she carefully protects it from the outside world, much as the greatest treasures are carefully kept around the world. Hidden and protected, even though we know it is there.

When Emily was born, I was wary of the chaos that had surrounded Carley and Madison's birth just 13 months prior. I was adamant that I wanted none of that this time and I told my family that this time it would just be the key players at the hospital but that they could visit later. The doctor induced me around 6 in the evening but warned that it would likely be a long labor.He reasoned that because Carley and Madi were born via C-section, it would be just like a first time mother in labor and the body would take time adjusting to it. HA! He had no idea (Nor did I!) just who was about to make her grand entrance into the world. The doctor was expecting me to be in labor for 12 hours or more. Emily had different plans.

In true Emily fashion, she was born a mere 46 seconds after midnight. The doctor almost didn't make it there in time. He told us that he had just gone to bed when he got the call to return. Thankfully he was there though, because there was a terrifying few minutes when the nurse announced that she was losing Emily's vitals. Something was very wrong. Emily's cord was wrapped around her neck twice and the life was being strangled out of her. There were shouted commands, nurses running in and out of the room, and just as I began to panic, Emily wailed and announced her presence to the world.

Forty six seconds after midnight, January 10th, 1994. My life would never be the same.


Emily had this amazing ability to wrap people around her tiny fingers. Carley and Madi were in awe of her. Who was this little creature who rarely cried, smiled so huge that her face transformed, and who loved smacking and pulling hair, much to the delighted giggles and pained screams of her older twin sisters? Grandma Thomas warned us that it is the quiet ones you have to be careful of, presumably because they would turn into terrors as they grew up.

Emily was definitely precocious. She knew what she wanted and would settle for nothing less. NO was not a word in her vocabulary. In fact, if you told her no, she would smile sweetly, do what she wanted anyway, and then return for a hug. It was as if she was saying, "Oh silly mother! I understand you have a job to do. Just don't move and I will be there to apologize in a minute." She was never a "bad" girl, she was just busy and wanted to explore everything. Looking back on it now, I have to smile because she is still a lot like that, and I try not to tell her no.

Emily hasn't had an easy childhood in any sense. She was hospitalized several times as an infant for RSV, asthma and pneumonia. The doctor's couldn't give us a reason for her respiratory problems and we spent many nights making emergency trips to PCMC when our baby girl was in distress. But there was a bigger medical issue lurking that we didn't understand and Emily's life was in constant peril because of it. She had survived all of the respiratory ailments and an operation to open her tear ducts, but when she began having frightening swelling and redness around her mouth and eyes, no one could understand it. I will never forget sitting in the doctor's waiting room with my 2 year old Emily whose eyes were bruised looking and swollen shut. Other parents glared accusingly at me - they probably thought she had been abused. The doctors told us that day that she probably got soap in her eyes. They flushed her eyes, gave her benedryl and sent us home. It would take several more terrifying trips to the doctor before we figured out what it was that made Emily swell so terribly.

Peanut Allergy.

I don't remember the exact moment of the epiphany, but I do know that our lives changed forever when we finally figured it out. Emily could not eat, touch or even smell peanuts or peanut products without triggering an immediate and severe allergic reaction. Unfortunately, because it had taken us so long to figure it out, her little body reacted by going into anaphylactic shock when she was exposed to peanuts. We had to declare war on peanuts.

I refer to it as a war because I never fought so hard to make people understand. No one wanted to believe us! Emily had to endure taunting from classmates, parent helpers purposely putting her in harm's way (here, hold a peanut butter coated pine cone!)and even a school secretary who had the nerve to tell me that she personally saw Emily eat a peanut butter cookie and therefore knew that Emily was not allergic. EXCUSE ME? Not possible lady! I remember telling her that I'd like to see her approach someone in a wheelchair and tell them that she knew they were faking. I didn't waste much time on her though. I called the district and brought the war to them. That secretary retired a short time later, but not before she tearfully apologized to me. I know she truly felt remorseful about what she had done, but I was not sorry to see her go. I like to think that by laying all the groundwork for Emily to be safe in school, maybe we made it easier for another allergic child somewhere down the road.

Emily started her first year of High School this year and it is the first time in many years that I have not asked for a meeting with the school staff to put safety measures in place that would protect Emily from potentially deadly exposure to peanuts at school. It is important for me that Emily learn to manage her own health so that she will always be OK. I can't always be there to protect my girl, so I must trust her to be vigilant on her own. But the truth is that I will always worry about her.

Reese's Peanut Butter Cups are everywhere and they are our nemesis, even if they are delicious! Mistakes can happen anywhere, even in our own home. We unknowingly brought peanut chip cookies into our home one year(a Christmas plate of goodies) and we nearly lost our Em that night when she ate a bite. I will forever be grateful for my brave husband who didn't hesitate to inject Emily with the epinephrine that saved her life. I never want to go through that again so be careful, Emily!

One of Emily's greatest qualities is her gift for entertaining. She loves to sing, act and make people smile any way that she can. She has a great group of friends who are much like her that way, and we have been treated to many occasions when they all burst into song together, laugh and dance around the room. Great kids! I have many great memories of show choir concerts, plays and other events where Emily performed and made us all so proud!



Emily, you are one of the sweetest people I have ever known. You are almost always happy and have a gift for cheering up everyone around you. I love the way your happiness and silly antics are contagious! You were not given the nickname of "Happiness Concentrate" for nothing. I hope that you always have the courage to follow your dreams, and don't be afraid to dream big. I adore your smile, your laughter, your hugs, and the way you like to kiss people on the nose when they are sad. You are the light of our family and we are so grateful for your wacky personality! You have an inner strength that not many people possess - always use it to do good things in life. Continue to share your happiness and strength with those around you and you will always be blessed.

I love you, sweet girl! Happy 16th Birthday!!!!

Emily's Letter

This is the letter that my cute girl keeps safely tucked away, under her pillow.


Emily,

From the moment you fought your way into this life you had more struggles than most people have to endure, but you never complain about the obstacles you face and, in fact, you bring sunshine and happiness everywhere you go. Your nickname as a baby was "Happiness Concentrate" and you still live your life that way. Your family looks up to you as a person who can be depended on to watch over and nurture those around you, bring a good joke into conversations, and make us smile with your goofball humor.

Em, you have always shown me that the simple things in life are what matters most. I am so touched that you let your baby cousin borrow your most precious toys, and even more touching was when your toy was ruined, your first concern was for the health of the puppy that destroyed it, rather than feeling sorrow over the loss of your possession. You have amazing qualities that the rest of us should strive to live by so hold on to those qualities and remember to live your life as a leader rather than a follower because you have so much to offer everyone around you.

Never forget how much your family loves you. You are the light and the joy that binds us together. I am so proud of all that you accomplish, whether it is academics, sports, or even the way you excel at video games! Your grandmas, grandpas, aunts, uncles and cousins are always telling me how incredible you are, and I have to agree. I always point out to them that I am lucky to be your Mom... You are such an easy girl to parent because you listen to your parents and heed our advice most of the time. ;)

It is my hope for you that you will keep your individual spirit strong, never let anyone tell you that you are not good enough or that you should change who you are. You are a fighter, Em, so be sure that you fight for the good things in life. You have so much life and beauty in you that just being near you makes my heart soar and I know that within you there are great and wondrous things to come. Just do not rush it. I want you to get out there and grab life head on, but at the same time, do not be in a hurry to grow up. One of your greatest strengths is that you are growing up without giving up the fun-loving child in you. Do not give up on the person you really are because believe me when I tell you that you are the kind of person I have always wished I could be.

You are my hero, Emily. Be strong and happy. That is all I have ever wanted for you.

Have fun camping and be safe! I am looking forward to hearing all about your adventures when you get home. ***Hugs, Snuggles, and Kisses***

Love, Mom

P.S. Carley thinks this letter sounds like a stranger wrote it, but I promise you that your MOM really did write the whole thing! LOL

We love you!! - Mom & Family

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Happiness in 2010

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” ~ Denis Waitley
Babehs "My daughters are so many things- Tiny discoverers of butterfly wings, huggers of teddies, sweet sleepyheads, little ones to dream for in bright years ahead... All Special people who right from the start had a place in our family and of course in my heart. And just when I think that I've learned all the things that my dear daughters are and the joy each one brings, a hug or a grin comes with such sweet surprise that love finds me smiling with tears in my eyes!"

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